Chemo Numero Tres

DAY35
There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.

~ Carl Gustav Jung


AC Chemo Treatment #3

I am exhausted. This post will be short, because getting up way early to make this appointment + making dinner for /getting kids to bed solo + chemo= has drained the soul container.

So yes. Mark & I took the soul container & went to the garage today for a very quiet day at Virtua in the chemo chair... Half an Ativan today and I napped nicely between water.
Just one other patient was in there, eating her lunch of a hot dog with the fixins and cheetos. The sound of the cheetos sounded just like those evil Pirate Booty Tings. I tried to read the newspaper the best I could as she ate them.

lol.

My oncology nurse told us too that some people can't wear red or even look at the name of the hospital again after their first chemo- their bodies attached that just like mine did with those nasty crunch sticks.
weird.
Nice quiet day, more red pee.

Dr. Cairoli praised my bloodwork and the breast tumor has shrunk even more!!!!! And my weight is staying the same, which is good too. I actually gained 2 lbs. oof. He said my symptoms shouldn't get any worse for the rest of the AC chemo either. which is 1 MORE VISIT.
Monday July 9 is final AC chemo. The 2 weeks off and I have 12 weekly chemos of Taxol, that will end mid-October if all scheduling goes well. Which means I have many options for Halloween as a bald woman. Please readers, I need some hilarious ideas if you got 'em. After 2009's Epic Bob Ross, I have decided not to go as a man ever again. Noone knew I was a girl and some thought I was some weird gay man from Asbury. I think it was the eyebrows and creepy moustache. They were right.

I also hooked up with the breast reconstruction part of all of this- an accredited doctor from Fox Chase in Philly named Dr. Patel who the main man for plastic surgery on cancer patients......so that's awesome. I see him July 24 to put the wheels into motion for surgery. He's a rare NJ visitor and works very closely with Dr Miller, where in most cases- Dr Miller does the mastectomy, and then Dr. Patel finishes the reconstruction all in one shot. Man, that would be so awesome. I hope I get that value meal.

A rainy weather day of driving.... I managed to score the last dozen of farm fresh eggs on the way home in Pemberton and some blueberries..... delicious.


A quick post to just say that I'm reaallllly tired like i walked to Belmar and back.My thigh bones and hips feel like a little person threw bricks at them.

So after getting these kids fed and in bed, I'm gonna lie down and hit.the.hay.
I'm so sad to be missing Beth's birthday party in Seaside.
Tomorrow we visit the missing circle of Dante's Inferno that is Neulasta.

much love*
xo
b

down day...kinda

went to work again today. I have the best boss in the entire world. And his wife is pretty awesome too. She works with the breast mammo part of  a local hospital so everyone knows firsthand what I'm going through for the most part. If you are reading this Lisa, I love you and thank you for all the help, emails and support. and you married a great man. :)

I had to take off early since I had yet more calls to make- make sure i visited the dentist before chemo starts, set up a meeting with the wig people, set everything up with my local ACS branch for any services they offer. I found out my insurance covers my wig 100%.
Not sure if i'll rock one all the time- it is summer and I'm sure I'll be hot and itchy.... The cosplay long hair wigs I found rule and take hot irons too.... I'm gonna order one to see how it goes. If i like it, I'll get a few more.

And I took the Ninja back to the store. That thing sucked. So inconvenient. plus it said it juiced on the box ---and it does not juice. I bought a standby juicer for the time being since our other one is a POS and slowly shitting the bed.
Rocking my kale, broccoli, carrots, celery, beets and spinach.... getting the blood ready for an onslaught of a heavy toxic bomb.

Checking out at Lowe's today- I noticed a priest was working there. full collar and cross- he wound up being my cashier and told me not to ride the broom mop i bought. lol. I wanted so bad to leave my transaction with the words "May the Lord be with you". all 15 years of Catholic school I know that mass by heart.I didn't say it though.   I did inquire to another employee as to why a priest was working there and she said that he was "in between churches". lol 
 ??? ok. add it to the small weird oddities I've been noticing lately.

and my husband is the greatest. I have to say that right here. So much we have gone through in our 14 years together... I don't know where I would be without the fabulous model of a real man he is. I love you hun <3

I've also noticed a major increase of birds landing and speaking close to me. Cue the Carpenters here <3
I had the red tail hawk, countless cardinals flying in my path while driving, and a blue jay and redwing blackbird visit me closer than any bird ever has in the past. Either my dad is hanging out with me or what....they;re everywhere though. I like good signs.

Tomorrow I get to go to Azie's school and teach tie dye.... :) so happy about that. :) a busy day of early morning work>blood test>mixing dyes> off to school.....

I need rest but I have so much to do. I would give anything right now for a full day of sleep without tests, needles, doctors calls, work, or mommy stuff. I am exhausted.

Rest in Peace, Donna Summer.