like this song? It was filmed in Normandy Beach near our home here- the town is now gone. Purchasing this song helps local Sandy relief for residents. You can pay what you want. ...(Thank you!)
Hooray. I am back. I missed you guys.
I hope y'all have been hanging in there being patient with my typos and absence this whole- polease know that typing has become more and more difficult as I type every other word either backwards or wrong, courtesy of chemo brain.
Ok- so Sandy.
Sandy came and went and destroyed a lot of our home here on the shore- not our address home- but our home home. our state home. It was a crazy night than landed us cut off from even our neighbors and the rest of the world- a night that had a wind that sounded like the most angry roaring tiger. I saw the beach the night before landfall in Bay Head- and I have to say- it felt so angry- the presence of an angry sea is really scary. The ocean rose up in the little time I was standing on the steps over the dunes. - but the time I left- it was up to the 3rd stair.
I knew this was not good. I actually ran down the stairs. away ...away
Our power went out the next day around 7pm. we sat through the storm watching the trees in the dark wind just fall down around you- lit only by the 4th of july fireworks all the transformers made as they came down.
Horrible scary.
Little did we know that just over the bridge- in the very same spot where the above picture was taken was swallowed by the ocean.
It disconnected a piece of the map right up that same right from the state. As we awoke the next morning- ti was like the cliche Dorothy when she opens the door and it turns to color in the wizard of oz. Only in reverse. What we saw was horrible, and we realized how lucky we really were.
without power or internet - we were unable to really see what this storm did until the power came back on and it was terrible.
the roads are damaged all over the place here- SO many families displaced and homes destroyed.
It makes you cry just to see where you grew up look like ground zero on 9-11.
After driving up to Asbury and back and seeing it all- it just leaves you with such a sinking feeling. You will never know what happened here until you see it for yourself.
Then I realized it.
Cancer is a hurricane. Just like it.
I sympathized with all those affected because I was going through the same thing. A shitty act of nature that just decided to take everything or just something special from you. Turn your life upside down.....cause discomfort. anxiety. the feeling of being lost and without a viable home.
Homes, like people- are just containers.
That's all.
Destroyed homes, homes to be fixed, homes that made it out ok.
Like cancer- sometimes it touches you lightly, other times it will kill you and take everything you have.
Sucks, eh? So I feel like now more can relate to how I feel... I hope this doesn't sound selfish- but it was like a whole round of chemo hit the earth. And I knew just exactly what it feels like.
I felt like if I couldn't do much and only the very least and best I could do about myself- at least I could try to help others. I baked cupcakes for the National Guard :) and doing my best to get the word out that we are still very much an open wound of a zip code (08742) and help and hot meals are still needed by those providing. I am grateful to have the capacity to help and our friends delivering goods from out of state for us have been GREAT have to stop though because the surgery is Friday, I have 1 more day of work left and I need to conserve resources.
I am just still so wanting to help.
Help is everywhere though- you can get free food at any church- help, shelter, warmth, - people are even bringing in food trucks in the midst of the disaster and serving food on the streets for free. Out of their pockets. Everyone is helping everyone else. It's beautiful.
I am overwhelmed by the charity and sadness of it at the same time.
My brother and sister are also coming up with a van full of stuff for the relief efforts Friday and I couldn't be happier to see them.
This storm has been ironically- a diversion- from the impending surgery I am doing my best to breathe through.
weird. It kicked my ass into doing stuff for others so much it really made me forget I had cancer for at least 2 days.
I uploaded my pictures to facebook since I love taking storm and New Jersey photos.....
hopefully it will shed light on the destruction that the news seems to forget. There are still people without power. Friends and family have lost entire homes, businesses. it is huge.
But our boardwalks are so damaged and next summer looks like a bust for doing anything with the kids there. and that's sad. we just love it there.
And Mark & I's first home was in Ortley Beach on 2nd ave a block away from the ocean. Now it's gone. A war zone, literally.
*sigh*
Homes, like bodies....are just....containers.
So much, so much to deal with.
But we're New Jersey and just like fighting cancer, we'll rebuild. I'll rebuild too.
My thinking, my heart. My health and my drive.
So much to come home to after surgery. I wish I could help my home heal more...
Just so much to digest.
and election day. I forgot about that=- but I did vote. and we still have not celebrated Halloween yet.
Friday is the big day. the big double M.
I will try to blog through the drugs from the hospital if I can- but this probably is my last post as a whole container.
We have come a long way so far. I love you and thank you.
see you on the flipside......
xo
b
